[In the car. Katy Perry's "Firework" comes on the radio]
Katy Perry: "Do you ever feel like a plastic bag, drifting through the wind, wanting to start again?"
Mom: What a weird analogy. No, I can't say I've ever felt like a plastic bag.
[An hour later, at Stop&Shop]
Cashier: Would you like paper or plastic bag?
Mom: Plastic please.
Me: You mean, you feel like a plastic bag today?
[At checkout at Target]
Sister: I wish I had a pet polar bear.
Me: That was random.
Sister: But I do, ya know? ...hey! You could get me a pet polar bear when you go to Alaska this summer!
Me: There are no polar bears left in Alaska. Sarah Palin shot them all.
Cashier: Right you are.
This one is best described in prose. So I was walking down the hall at school when I go by this couple locking a fierce game of tonsil hockey. Whatever. A few seconds later, I hear a voice behind me. I turn to see this tiny freshman girl ranting at the couple. I hear a snippets like, "OMG thats so disgusting, why are you doing that in the hall?" and "I mean, seriously, it gross, and no one wants to see it, okay?". It's all I can do not to burst out laughing right there. Way to go freshman girl for saying whats on your mind. It made my day.